Interior intelligence, with teeth

Your room deserves the roast.

Upload a photo and get an AI critique that clocks the sad plant, fixes the lighting, and gives you a real path to a better space.

No design degree. No beige mood-board monologue.

Roast incoming

Verdict

“This room has potential. It is currently hiding under that overhead light.”

Built for the first-apartment era

A founder promise, not fake applause.

Funny first. Useful always.

Your room stays your business.

Fixes are practical, not precious.

The roast-to-reveal loop

RoastRoom makes room advice feel like content you want to send to the group chat—then backs it up with an actual plan.

01 / Upload

A room photo is all it takes. We look at layout, light, clutter, color, and the objects quietly causing chaos.

We notice: the lonely wall, the rug that is too small, and the lamp trying its best.

02 / Roast

Savage enough to be fun, specific enough to make sense. The roast is made to be shared, not endured.

03 / Fix

Get three doable fixes free—or unlock a redesign mockup, mood board, and shoppable list when you are ready to commit.

Your roast comes in a shareable format because a little public accountability is sometimes the fastest route to a better living room.

When a fix needs a find, we point you toward pieces that match the plan.

Choose your level of intervention

The free roast is the whole point. Upgrade only when you want a visual redo and a shopping plan to match.

Free Roast

For rooms that need a little truth.

Glow-Up

Full redesign

For when the roast hits a little too close to home.

$9 per room

One photo. One gloriously honest verdict. Three ways to make your space look like you meant it.